"Knowledge comes with deaths release", or so says David Bowie. Lilacs in the Breeze can relate to this, his season is now over, and defeat is mighty painful (but with this knowledge, a better drafting strategy may come into play next year).
Defeat at the hands of Frienemy III! The Second Champion ever in the Super Crunch League!!! What a match, Frienemy won 9 in a row to stay alive and take the championship from everyone's favorite fantasy killer, Lilacs in The Breeze!!! How hard they fall, eh? Not everything is honky dory for Lilacs right now. Forget the womens movement, this is a huge step forward for feminism, all women around the world should use Frienemy as an example of what hard work and a belief in yourself can accomplish.
WOW! FRIENEMY III, You are now owed $130!! (dont worry Lilacs, you get $50)
In our first ever consolation prize, The New Fantasy eeked out a victory and is now owed $20 as well against the one, the only, By-Tor and the Snow Dogz. (I shouldnt have spent all the league money, this will hurt the wallet). I think you deserve it, to win feels good, now next years dues will be free for you, congratulations, fantasies really do come true.
With New Years a heart beat away, I promise you this, next year I will be more diligent and inspire greatness in all of you with amazingly inspirational tomes to excite and tempt intense participation in this blog, the best blog in the world (except Frienemy's of course, http://thelightarchive.blogspot.com/).
You deserve that plug, you are a winner, and that taste should not go away any time soon, Happy New Year to all, see you on the gridiron next year.
I'm having a New Year's Eve party and all Crunchleague colleagues are invited to come along for the ride. I have brewed some hard apple cider that should be ready right about now and Lindsay and I are going to make some homemade pulled pork sliders. And there will likely be other stuff. A little before midnight we're going to see this:
So come on over, lick your wounds, and we'll make Frienemy and Lilacs go on all the beer runs since they've got some $$$ to play with.
I am writing as a last minute decision to imbue this final game today with some excitement! My absence from this blog has been unforgivable up to this point, I know, please forgive.
All I can say is kudos to Frienemy and Lilacs for making it this far. Lilacs had been steaming through the competition since week two, there was never any doubt of his ability to make it this far. On the other hand Frienemy has struggled and come from behind with smart pick-ups and a belief in herself. It goes to show you that women can actually be good at football too, no? The winner will get a cold hard $130! While second place will get $50, so no worries, you are both going to earn some cash to buoy your pockets after all the holiday gift giving you most likely participated in.
Remember!, 5th place wins their money back as well, so The New Fantasy, or By_tor, there is still something to play for, twenty big ones!
Congratulations to all for beating me so thoroughly and consistently this season, I know this will never happen again (I will no longer draft WR's first, this I promise).
Cincinnati Bengals (and you brushed me) wide receiver Chad Ochocinco confirmed during a radio interview that he sent gift baskets that included roll-on deodorant to the Ravens' secondary as well as linebackers Ray Lewis and Terrell Suggs.
AP Bengals wide receiver Chad Ochocinco sent roll-on deodorant to the Ravens' defense. There were strong rumors circulating around the Ravens about Ochocinco's special deodorant delivery earlier today first reported by National Football Post.
The implication about the deodorant is fairly obvious.
"I not only sent them gift baskets, but I sent them something they could use so they don't sweat," Ochocinco told 105.7 FM.
Five years ago, Ochocinco sent bottles of Pepto Bismol to the Cleveland Browns' defensive backs prior to kickoff.
By-Tor, may this day be one of joy and celebration
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
I found this essay by Chuck Klosterman to be very insightful into the ritual of football viewing, even though I am usually not much of a fan of his writing. Nor of watching football, really. But I gather that I have that to look forward to in my old age.
And here is a picture appropriate for the weekend. Haunted beer.
For the first time ever, all managers reached deep into their pockets and coughed up the large 20 spot to fully participate in this years fee. Money down the toilet? Not if you win. I am so happy I am in fact crying hysterically as I write this. The tears are flowing so strong and hard and I am hiccuping, it is really too hard to spell correctly.
we really need to spice up the blog this year, so i have posted a pic of some popular frienemies from some tv show i have never seen, but they look bitchy.
Welcome to the game, we have so much to look back on, but so little time, week three is almost upon us. If you look at our rankings, we have the top, Lilacs in the Brees at 2 and 0, and we have the bottom, you brushed me, at 0 and 2. Everyone, and I mean everyone, is in the middle, a clean little middle. All 1 and 1's, so pretty in a row. Wherever you stand now has no bearing on the future, things will change, like life, so is fantasy football. What are your dreams? What are your nightmare? Do you want to be in first, do you attain to be the best? Well, it looks like it will be tough with Lilacs scoring over 140 points each week, I thought I might have a chance with 120-something, but no such luck, he might just be unbeatable.
There once was a movie called Unbreakable, and what a movie it was, starring Bruce Willis as the hero and Samuel Jackson as the villain. Bruce Willis realized after living so many years, that he was impervious to pain and could not be cut by any sharp object, never was sick, and had only one weakness, water. Lilacs in the Brees is just like Bruce Willis, impervious to fantasy football losses, he is Unbeatable, having an amazing two weeks, of the likes the gods have only seen. Will he come back to earth? Will NY NY Sports defeat him this week, and act as his kryptonite, we shall see . . .
Here is an enlightening video on how to dance like a robot, it is in honor of Chris Johnson acting like a machine and scoring a sick and amazing 46 points. 46 points, lets think about this for a second. "If I had two players that could perform like this I could win the championship", must have been on your mind as you looked at this impossibility, but alas, only one person owns this beast, his name is Makin' Moves. Congratulations on this freak week, relish it, bath in it, you deserve it. After being beaten pretty badly in week one, you have made quite a comeback, I do not want to face you at this point.
Husbands and Wives, good movie no? In the battle of the sexes this week, Heaven and Hell proved his worth, no longer the whipping post, he overcame his wife in what will be forgotten after week three, but what can be relished currently in the household, Dallas Clark did amazingly, and some other players performed reasonably well to keep the flame alive. I congratulate you H and H, and hope you continue to achieve and join your fellows in some joyous banter on the field of winners.
We wont call it a comeback, but what an amazing "turn of events" for the new fantasy, when last minute, Monday night, Ronnie Brown scored 25 points to put him over the top, and allowed the defeat of you brushed me, who is currently in last place with a record of 0 and 2. You redeemed yourself and proved that maybe there is a new fantasy in town, the fantasy that Ronnie Brown is back, and poor, poor you brushed me, who is getting sodomized in this league, if he had three wishes I wonder what they would be?
Love? I sense no love between these the two teams of By Tor and NY NY. Will this ever change? Will they come together and merge souls and finally be one? I for one wish this would happen and they could find their truth as friends and allies, rather than enemies on the field. May they reunite in the future fields of glory. . .
Oh, Tony, you are the greatest. Please, please will you score 40 points tonight against the Giants so I may beat Lilacs in the Breeze? I know you can do it, and you will.
Wow. One week down, and who would've guessed the outcome? This is the beginning of a long journey, one with many ups and downs, one that will undoubtedly test your patience and will. As I sat in my living room, with laptop heating up on my lap, I stared deep into the recesses of "stat tracker" and found the strength to continue and persevere. Will you do the same? I hope so. I hope you fight, fight for what belongs to you, fight for what you believe in, victory.
And now we continue on to the first of a seemingly neverending . . WEEKLY RECAP!!!!
Bloodiest Battle:
In what promised to be an interesting game, Lilacs in the Breeze took on the newcomer Makin' Moves and thoroughly beat him into a bloody pulp. With consistent scoring from each and every player on his roster, and unbelievably incredible play from TE John Carlson, Lilacs holds the crown as the one to beat this year. Makin' Moves who was off to an embarrassing start, redeemed himself with good play from two running backs no one had any expectation from. Will Philadelphia do as good this coming week, I can only pray this doesn't happen.
Second most impressive start:
Holy Shminoly! Drew Brees was singularly amazing, helping VeeDazzler put a nail in the coffin of the new fantasy and had what amounts to one third of his opponents point total in one fell swoop, amazing, the projections might have been true. The new fantasy had good play from Julius Jones and Donovan McNabb, will his other players catch up? Only week two can tell us. After the game VeeDazzler was seen running in the streets, with nothing on but a neon g-string, holding two sparklers in his hands screaming, "Thomas Jones and Drew Brees! Thomas Jones and Drew Brees! I will bring you all to your knees!"
A very tight match indeed:
In what was an amazing last minute win, Frienemy III squeezed out a win from you brushed me, in impossible Leprechaun style, it looks like you brushed me got brushed himself! An unbelievable end of game grab from Greg Jennings put frienemy over the top in what was a very close game the whole way through, a true nail biter. Not to disparrage the numerous players that performed wonderfully on you brushed me's team, MJD, kudos, Chris Cooley, wonderful job, Ray Rice, very nice.
The most amazing, and closest game:
What was an intense nail biter (for yours truly), in which carl's cantankerous overcame the cold emotion of By-Tor and the Snow Dogz. Having allocated his draft choices to the trusty the computer, ones based on statistical analysis and years of technological advancements, By-Tor had an early lead with superb play from one man named Santonio Holmes, but as the days events wore on, there was no one left to take it home for By-Tor and his bit players. Having a tandem of Tony's on his team, carl's will roll, and roll hard, picking up steam and wiping out all that get in his way, this team will not be denied, as proven by the performance this week. I truly pity all that will come in contact with this team, be warned.
And the screaming goat award goes to . . . .
Heaven and Hell vs. NY NY SPORTS SPORTS! It was again man vs. machine in what turned out to be an underwhelming performance from both teams. Matt Schaub was embarrassed, Lance Morre and Steve Slaton were nowhere to be seen, yet there is a diamond in the rough, Mike Bell, who might just turn out to be one of the greatest pick-ups in the early season. NY NY might not have even watched the game, but he did eek out a win with the angelic Tom Brady, who will hopefully be throwing rainbows to Randy Moss all season, and Westbrook isnt half bad either.
With week one down and 15 more weeks to go, there is still alot that will be unveiled as our season progresses. Will Lilacs remain on top? Will Heaven and Hell remain at the bottom? If history tells us anything, week one shall be a wash, and I cannot wait to see what happens in glorious week two! I leave you with a hopeful video, whenever you are feeling down, just sit down at your computer, call up this blog, and just enjoy, you deserve it.
It is the most anticipated moment of the season, the anxiety is strong within us. I give you this inspirational tome to wet the appetite, and as a little gift towards reaching for the stars, have hope! This season will be full of magic . . . .
Friends and Neighbors, it has been a long off season, but I welcome you back to the SUPER CRUNCH LEAGUE!!! Have you been tired of reality, with all its daily troubles, and all the minuscule stresses of everyday life? Well have no fear! It is once again time to delve deep into the recesses of your repressed fantasies, where men in tights run amok, and dreams become reality. We will watch amazing stars dance their way to fantasy stardom, where a touchdown doesn't equal 6 points, but is an actualization of a dream, a dream where you are leaping with joy and celebration, you were right, you made the correct call, congratulations, life is meaningful once again.
We have some old and well known teams coming back this year, and some interesting new ones, some gentle, and some not so gentle. I welcome one and all, old and new, to this exciting year sure to be full of Tears of Joy and of course tears of sadness. But alas, your efforts won't be for naught, and that brings me to my next point . . . . .
MONEY!!!! (There is nothing wrong with recycling imagery) This year the league is once again $20 per person (for those who didn't pay, don't worry, I forgive you, but maybe Facemelter does not). The $20 will be broken down as follows. . .
1st place - $130 2nd place - $50 5th place - $20 (they get their money back)
I know this might not seem kosher, but it will demand continued interest from the people in the bottom bracket consolation prize at least into the playoffs, and continued interest cannot be a bad thing, right? I will update the list at the upper right hand corner of this blog (you may gander there now), and if you are not on the list by the third week, all your peers will make fun of you, and that will just be embarrassing.
I once again want to welcome any and all blog posts, no matter how trivial, your participation is welcomed, and encouraged. Fantasy Football is a place of expression, where you are free to expunge yourself away from any judgment, feel free, free yourself and your inner blog poster, let them run amok on these pages, which will be archived forever for posterity.
The draft is this Thursday at 8:00! I greatly look forward to sharing this time with you. It is about to begin, our adventure into greatness, good luck, I have faith in all of you.
